So, what is this picture of, you ask. Why has this silly, whiny bitch been complaining ad nauseum about her infertility woes when, gasp, she’s PREGNANT?!
Well, let me explain… FALSE POSITIVE, DUH! This is just one of the marvels of modern fertility medicine. So last night I injected myself with my “trigger shot.” This trigger shot, containing hCG, will make me ovulate in 36 hours which roughly coincides with the time of my egg retrieval. My doctor explained that hCG is the thingy (non-technical term) released by the placenta after an embryo implants. Pregnant women pee it out after conception. Hence, the piss test. Who knew that this shit could make you ovulate?! Crazy!
So, you know me (or not)… my curiosity got the best of me and I had to spend the next 12 hours obsessively Googling hCG Trigger Shot to find out what it is, what it does, etc., etc.
Let me copy and paste:
Because of its similarity to LH, hCG can also be used clinically to induce ovulation in the ovaries. As the most abundant biological source is women who are presently pregnant, some organizations collect urine from pregnant women to extract hCG for use in fertility treatment.
(gotta love wiki! Emphasis added by me)
Yes, that's right my dear readers. Last night I injected myself with the powdered piss of a pregnant woman. I can't decide if that's cool or if it just adds insult to injury. So, not only can you fertile bitches conceive naturally, accidentally, whatever, your nasty stinky pee-pee contains a magical elixir that can make my infertile ass ovulate. I would just like to say FUCK YOU AND YOUR FERTILITY, but I humbly thank you for your pee-pee....
Sincerely, your angry in-fer-tile,
Andrea

No comments:
Post a Comment